MYP 5a Sex Education Lesson 1

• Verzorging
• Middelbare school
• vwo
• Leerjaar 5

Sex Education 

By the end of this unit I will be able to:

• Understand intimacy and readiness including sexual pressure
  
• Know what consent is, how to give and not to give and withdraw
  
• Understand pornography and it's impact on understanding consent and gender inequalities
• Knowledgable on various contrception methods, consequences of not using contraception; pregnancies and STI's

Having sex

Why do people have sex?

Having Sex

There are many reasons why people have sex, some of which are healthier than others. These include the following:

• to strengthen a bond in a relationship,
  
• for pleasure or enjoyment,
  
• because they are sexually attracted to someone,
  
• to procreate (have children),
  
• to explore their body in a sexual way,
  
• because they feel pressure from others to have sex or think it will disappoint someone else if they don’t have sex,
  
• because they think that it is an obvious step in their relationship.
  

Remember, wanting to have sex is a normal feeling but so is not wanting to have sex. People are also able to change their minds about sex – they might have sex and then decide that they didn’t like it or weren’t ready for sex – either for the first time or with that particular partner. This decision is OK and should be respected.

Sexual Pressure

Some people feel pressure to have sex before they are ready. This may be because:

• their friends are talking about having sex,
  
• their partner wants to have sex with them,
  
• TV shows, films and other media show people their age having sex,
  
• people have said unkind things or bullied them for not having had sex.
  

It can be hard to deal with this kind of pressure, but it is important to trust yourself and make the decision that is best for you. Trust that you are the best person to make decisions for yourself and your body. Your body, Your choice.

A good starting point may be deciding what you think you would be comfortable with ahead of time. You can always change your mind but it is a good idea to know what your boundaries are and communicate them to your partner.

Set clear boundaries by telling your partner what you are comfortable with as well as what you are not comfortable with. For example, you may not want to engage in sexual activity but you may be comfortable with kissing, cuddling, touching each other or something else.

Are You Ready?

Can you say Yes to these questions?

1. Does it feel right?

2. Do me and my partner feel the same about each other?

3. Have we talked about using condoms to prevent STIs and HIV, and was the talk OK?

4. Have we got contraception organised to protect against pregnancy?

5. Do I feel able to say "no" at any point if I change my mind, and will we both be OK with that?

Are You Ready?

AND answer No to these questions?

1. Do I feel under pressure from anyone, such as my partner or friends?

2. Could I have any regrets afterwards?

3. Am I thinking about having sex just to impress my friends or keep up with them?

4. Am I thinking about having sex just to keep my partner?

Intimacy Without Sex

If a person does not want to have sex, there are still a number of ways for them to experience intimacy without sex. Some of these may also happen before sex or alongside sex. Ways to have intimacy and strengthen a bond without having sex may include:

touches or 

caresses 

kissing

compimenting each other

giving

massages

hugging or

cuddling

deep

conversations

quality time together

holding hands

sustained eye contact

actively listening

sitting close together

being open and honest

What is Consent?

Consent is an agreement by choice made by someone with the 

freedom                 and capacity to consent

the choice must be made without pressure

the person must be able to make the choice, e.g. be old enough, and in a clear state of mind

Consent

Even if you have had sex before, you are still able to say ‘no’. Sexual consent is specific to each sexual act, each time it happens. Even if you have done a specific sexual act with that specific partner before, it does not mean you automatically want do this again. It is not OK for a partner to put pressure on you.

Appropriate Language

Inapproprate Statements

If you really loved me you would do this for me

I get what you're saying but when that happened I felt...

I really like you but something's really bothering me so can we talk about it?

You're overreacting - grow up!

I'm sorry I made you feel that way. Let me explain things from my point of view...

I don't like your friends so it's me or them!

I'm sorry. How can I make this better?

I hadn't thought of it like that before...

I promise I'll never do it again, as long as you don't upset me like that again...

It's easy to find someone else, so stop nagging me or we're through!

Whoa - that didn't feel right. Let's talk about it

Red Flags

•  Read the potential relationship red flags in the image
• Consider whether they are indicators of a coercive relationship or could be solved using effective communication

Are there any red flags missing from the list?

Relationship Scenarios

Read the relationship scenarios and highlight behaviours in the following colours :

•  Red - behaviours which are concerning
• Orange - anything that is not quite right
• Green - positive relationship behaviours

For any concerning behaviours you have highlighted, what should the characters do to make sure they are safe?

Relationship Scenarios: Key Points

Scenario 1

Jamil and Amari have swimming in common which provides a positive way to connect.

Having conversations to figure out what each other is happy with - 'checking in '.

Jamil went to a friends party without inviting Amari.

Amari's upset so they don't go to the swimming gala as agreed.

Scenario 2

Jenna and Harry are already friends which shows they can enjoy time together.

Jenna is rushing Harry into moving faster than he wants to, based on behaviour in previous relationships.

Relationship Scenarios: Key Points

Scenario 3

Veeda and Idris have similar values as they share a common culture and faith.

They enjoyed seeing each other at family events.

They discussed and agreed that there will be no intimacy before marriage as this is in-keeping with their culture and faith.

Veeda and Idris want the relationship to move at a different pace. ('It depends' as there is no evidence that they discussed their differences.)

Veeda is being pressured into a (potentially forced) marriage abroad.

Relationship Scenarios: Key Points

Scenario 4

Taylor and Addison seem quite happy together.

Taylor gets upset when Addison messages and goes out with friends.

Addison cut down on going out with friends to make Taylor happy. (Note that a reasonable request for a partner to spend a balance of time between friends and their partner is different to stopping seeing or messaging their friends.)

Taylor has taken Addison's phone and was violent towards them.

Pornography is...

Books, magazines, films, etc. with no artistic value that describe or show sexual acts or naked people in a way that is intended to be sexually exciting.

However, recent theorists have defined it more specifically as material which presents people—particularly women—as mute, available, and subordinate sexual objects, often shown in a context of violence.

How true is this comment?

It's OK to watch porn, everyone does it.

Task:

Discuss the comment in pairs for 2 minutes

Some impacts...

Studies have shown that when children and young people are exposed to 

sexually explicit material, they are at greater risk of developing:

• unrealistic attitudes about sex and consent

• more negative attitudes towards roles and identities in relationships

• more casual attitudes towards sex and sexual relationships

• an increase in ‘risky’ sexual behaviour

• unrealistic expectations of body image and performance

Some stats...

Significant gender differences were observed in young people aged 11-16 

during research conducted by the Children’s Commissioner, NSPCC and 

Middlesex University. 

Boys reported a higher frequency of exposure to pornography (56%) 

than girls (40%). 

It also explored whether young people had ever seen pornography, 

whether intentionally, or not. 

If looking at their intentional seeking of pornography, 

then the gender differences are wider with 59% 

of boys reportedly doing so compared to 25% of girls.

Myth

Reality

watching pornography is a good way to learn about sex and relationships

The bodies shown in pornography are what you can expect from future partners

Women are 'always up for it' just like in pornography

Pornography degrades women as it shows them as sex objects

Watching pornography is bad for you

Pornography uses actors

Sex in pornography is the same as sex in real life

Watching pornography when you are young will affect your future relationships

Watching pornography is just a bit of fun and helps boost your body image and self

More males watch pornography than females

Pornography uses real people and real stories

Pornography only shows men as dominant

Women like to be treated as they are in pornography

You will only feel confident about your body if it looks similar to people in pornography

Contraception

Contraception refers to methods, devices, or medications used to prevent unintended pregnancy.

Only one kind of  contraception (condom) also prevent STIs/STDs (Sexual Transmitted Infections/ Sexual Transmitted Diseases), such as chlamydia or gonorrhea.

Teenage 

Pregnancy

Statistics

(2021)

Amalie & Dan

Read the scenario on your handout and respond to the four questions surrounding it

• How might Amalie be feeling?
• How might Dan be feeling?
• What options do they have?
• What might their next steps be?

Dan and Amalie are both 16 years old. Amalie has missed her last period, so asked Dan to buy a pregnancy test and bring it round when her parents were out. 

She has just taken the test and the result is positive.

Next Steps...

In case of an unplanned pregnancy there are 3 options:

Write down a three-point action plan of next steps your character might take

Become a 

Parent

Termination

Relinquish the child for adoption

This could include who the character might speak to, who they might turn to for emotional support, what conversations they might need to have, or where they might go for further help and advice.

Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STD's)

Human Papilloma Virus (HPV)

HPV does not usually cause symptoms

Sometimes the virus can cause painless growths or lumps on your body (warts)

HPV is a group of related viruses

There are more than 200 types. About 40 of them are spread through direct sexual contact with someone who has the virus

They can also spread through other intimate, skin to skin contact

Some of these types can cause cancer

HPV is very common

Condoms can reduce but not eliminate risk.

Vaccinations given to prevent.

Scraping cells from the cervix in females to screen for the virus. Visual idenitification in males

No treatment

Homework for Monday

Read BS 6:

Make assignment 1, 2, 3, 4, 7, 10

Homework for 9th of April

Read BS 5. 

Make assignment 2, 3, 6, 8

What to learn for the test:

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