What to tell & how to connect?
The facilitator sets the example with a personal experience. This may seem uncomfortable at first, but as you gain more experience, you become more familiar.
Choosing your form to express your experience not only makes you a model for your participants, but also allows you to grow in wording your experience and your responses yourself. The same thing happens with the participants.
There is never a unequivocal way of telling a story and answering a question. To bring your participants to the point of realizing this truth is an important goal. It will empower you as it will empower your participants.
What to keep in mind when you choose an experience to share?
- Choose your experience by thinking of the theme and how to connect it to a real life experience of your own.
- Write the possible associations that come to mind down with one word.
- Choose one that is situated not to long ago. If it is longer ago tell it in a form that takes it more to the present.
- Do take care to share an experience that is too overwhelming or big.
- Select one that is more common ground and include details to bring it more to life.
- A reflection of a dialogue can be useful as well to include.
- It is important that you share the parts of your experience without cutting it short and choosing your details in such a way that you cater to your audience.
- You tell your story from start to finish.
- Do not share too long, stop at a point where intrest is high and allow for questions.
Your listeners may ask questions to get more information, for clarification or out of curiosity. The questions should relate to the shared experience. It is important to remind everyone of this the moment you give the floor for questions.
Next, devise a question to invite your participants. Begin the question by telling about a time when ... and what happened. Or think about a time you had an experience with ... and how that went. Or for example, a time when you had an experience with ... and how that went. What happened? What was said?
An example
The facilitator, wanting to work with the topic of boundaries, tells about a time he/she was abused. This experience is soon too big. The participants are automatically - a characteristic of associating - put on the track of remembering an experience that is too overwhelming. The sense of safety in the group and of each participant in the group is then compromised.
Moreover, participants without much experience cannot connect. Therefore, from the list of memories, choose an experience with which participants can best connect. Often that is a less fraught experience that you can share with some details that give air and perhaps even a humorous touch to what you share.
For example, if you want to talk about a big theme like discrimination, you can bring it closer by choosing an experience that has to do with exclusion. You can then tell about a time when you were left out or when you left someone else out. In the trilogy format you can later link this to discrimination.